A Fallen Hero

Today I found out that one of my "heroes" passed away. I am still in such shock I don't think it has hit me yet. As most people know I spent every summer growing up at a camp located on Kirkwood Lake. There was this girl that was 3 years older than me, which now doesn't seem like any difference but as a teenager seemed huge. Her name was Rina and her camp name was Sierra. Sierra was a very special person who was very mellow and calm. She was one of those people that you hung out with and they just made you feel relaxed. I loved spending time with her and she always had the best advice. I would tell her about boy troubles and girl drama and she always seemed to know what to say. I remember one time (I was probably 16) I was sitting by the lake thinking and wondering if I would ever find a guy. I remember thinking I would be alone forever. Rina came up behind me and started telling me a story about this guy in her dorm room who saw a picture of me and asked if he could meet me. I never even told her what I was thinking about but her comment made me feel a million times better. I remember thinking it was like she read my mind. Looking back, I am not even sure if there was a guy but to a sixteen year old girl, it was the best thing she could have said. I looked up to her so much. She moved to Montana and became a highschool teacher where I am sure she touched the lives of many 16 year old girls. I hadn't spoken to her in a few years but I always hoped that we would get back in touch again. I thought about her often. She recently took her own life. Most of me is sad, but part of me is angry. How could such a beautiful person not realize how wonderful they really are? I wonder if she thought about all of the people that she may not talk to every day, but who still hold a very special place in their hearts. Maybe it is a sign, that we should slow down and really make sure to tell people how much we love them and how special they are. It is funny how people from your past can impact you so much and when you hear something so tragic like this, you can revert back to that lost sixteen year old. I just wish she was here to comfort me again. Sierra you will be truley missed. Thank you for being one of my heroes.